Mad Max: Shiner Bock Road III

Mad Max: Shiner Bock Road II

The race for Shiner Bock gold rages on, and there is absolutely no rest for the weary. The league leader, The Confessor, aimed to stay undefeated. Despondent Dave on the other hand wanted to end his losing streak.

Bloody Mayhem was fresh off of a win and ready for his next victim. Vexed Viet and his Australian Cattle Chinchilla-Dog wandered forward, knowing it was going to be a war going against Bloody Mayhem.

Bloody Mayhem: Rugby rugby lovely day!!!

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Bloody Mayhem came blazing into the contest, Ensign Eifert in tow. He was very confident, riding an impressive winning streak. His team was a goon squad, both intimidating and relentless. Led by Bombardier Brady and the mad scientist, Dr. Brown, they wrecked havoc on the league.

They rushed forward at Vexed Viet, ready to do anything to serve their bloody master.  Those were some maddeningly obedient fantasy football killing machines.

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The battle raged on, and it was apparent that Bloody Mayhem meant business. When Captain Falcon Julio had a quiet game, Vexed Viet knew he had to act fast.

Vexed Viet: Hey Brahptimus, I could use some help Bro.

Brahptimus Prime: Here, borrow these to help you deal with it.

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Vexed Viet: Are those Oakleys? Schway!

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Brahptimus Prime: You’ve got the poweeeeeer!

Vexed Viet quickly gained control of the match behind the brilliant game of Hopkins and Brahptimus’s shades. He roundhouse kicked (Walker Texas Ranger style) Bloody Mayhem in the face, knocking his goggles clean off!

Bloody Mayhem: Zounds! Pigs will fly before I fall to you!

Vexed Viet: BM, you look ill. I have a diagnosis for you.

Vexed Viet – 243

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vs.
Bloody Mayhem – 168

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Vexed Viet: It looks like you have swine flu.

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It was a mad week!  Sapulpa Star got his first victory of the season. (What the mess?!) Behind a strong team filled with stars like Riley Cooper and Reggie Wayne, he showed just how unlucky No skill all Luck really is. Sapulpa Star was quite proud of himself after his surprising accomplishment.

Sapulpa Star: I am quite proud of myself.

No skill all Luck: I need to borrow some skill from Holo Molos.

Holo Molos: Oh-my-lanta! I’m not in the league anymore, but I will help you out if I can borrow some Bevo Bucks.

No skill all Luck: trade declined*

Bro-est Bros: Now that is an example of proper fantasy trading etiquette.

Despondent Dave was also victorious, proving that there are some things Finerthana49er. He couldn’t contain his euphoria. He started to wiggle, just subtly at first. Then he straight up started to dance it out to his victory jam.

Despondent Dave: You gotta let me know… are we human… or are we dancer? freakin’ n vibing*

Nothingfinerthana49er: Slow your body roll Dave… I’m still up on you in the standings. #burn #betterthanyou

The most notable victory of the week was by Best of the Bridges, who beat the league leading The Confessor and ended his undefeated streak.

The Confessor: I must confess, I didn’t see that coming.

Best of the Bridges: Oh cry me a Rivers.

The Confessor: sniff*

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After his great win, Sapulpa Star climbed up zero spots to last place. The Confessor settled into second, waiting for the opportunity to strike again for the top spot.  The race is about to hit the midway point, and Vexed Viet is back in the driver’s seat. He could just taste that Shiner Bock gold!

Despondent Dave: Holy Favre tat brah!

Brahptimus Prime: Hey BM, does your back keep texting pictures of your junk to sideline reporters?

Vexed Viet: Yeah, do you buy relaxed fit jeans for your back?

Vexed Viet/Brahptimus Prime: bro dap*

Bloody Mayhem: My back tattoo was from my homer days. I’m not a homer anymore, so the joke is on you!

Vexed Viet: Nice comeback. Was that your back’s idea?

Bloody Mayhem: Stop bringing Favre into this, cruel man! I’ll get you next time around…

James Starks: Maybe play me next time around.

Bloody Mayhem: STFU Starks! Ahhhhh! Curse you and your ridiculous luck, Vexed Viet!

Vexed Viet: BM, I have some advice for you…

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Vexed Viet and Buddy continue on their path towards the ultimate prize, the Shiner Bock Trophy! With everyone now gunning for him, his spot at the top is not safe. The competition is heating up and each match up becomes more and more important. Who is mad enough to make it to the end?

Fact – People that read Vivid Karet are good natured and generous.

I know this isn’t a Face the Facts, but I just wanted to take a quick respite from the trash talking to call attention to something important. Chris Lyon (Bloody Mayhem) is a good friend of ours, and what he lacks in fantasy football prowess he more than made up for by bravely serving our country with the Marines. His wife is currently battling Lyme Disease, and if you or any of your loved ones have gone through this, you know what a tough road this is for him and his family. Please check out my buddy’s site to find out more about their story and information on ways you can help.

Happy Friday!

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